unusualness
im missing you @ 4:27 p.m. on 2003-01-27
The route to school this morning was unusually bare. It looked like Marion after 8 p.m. on weekends. Empty. A ghost town. But, peaceful.
Pulling into the junior parking lot, four minutes before class began...just a few cars clustered in the middle row. Everyone was hiding from the forbidden cold.
The hallways were unusually dark. The library was closed. The lights of computers gleemed and echoed throughout the "H" shaped stretch of the main building.
I felt invisible. The Ghost of many Days passed. I noticed that over the years, Marion High turns antique. The red metal lockers begin to rust. The dents in them incandesce with pride, pounded by some angry guys fist. I study the fists of the beastly males in attempt to find the convict.
Commotion moves in the middle left hallway. My art partner from 10th grade has her fight face on. Last year, I would have grabbed her by the forearm and pulled her out of the crowd. But now, I just smile and say "Roseandra" and shake my head in something other than disbelief. She flashes a wave and gets back to her work. Her reason for coming to school is to defend herself. No one fears her. Who could fear such a timid body...short and pudgy, shiny deep brown skin, long braided weave and some blue jacket that she's worn since I met her in eighth grade homeroom. Her field in comedy is so much more promising. I think she's unaware.
My wallet holds a mere 29 dollars (all one dollar bills), a GAP card, an Old Navy card, an old movie ticket stub...and a picture of Tara, that I can't get my eyes off of.
I really need money. I have the possibility of winning some money from Creative Communications. I made the semi-finals of a poetry contest that I entered last fall. So, now if only I get the proof in by February 4th...
I saw an old preschool friend today. I have two vivid memories of preschool at First United Methodist Church on the religious side of Missouri Street.
I remember sitting in the reading loft on carpet that was the color of my pet cocker spaniel's fur coat. I was reading Dino the Dinosaur when I discovered that a lowercase d is the same as a lowercase b, backwards.
I remember playing house beneath the reading loft as my preschool teacher explained that a happy family doesn't necessarily mean a mommy and a daddy. It could mean a mommy and a mommy or a daddy and a daddy. Or just one mommy or one daddy. There is all types of happy families. And, I always remembered that and told whoever I could.
Evidentally, the entire school fears a computer virus that is being carried around the internet. They are supposedly putting a block on our hard drives...but they never do anything right. This irks me.
I was asked by another old friend if I would direct a porn for him. I said "As long as you're not in it." I get asked that a lot and I give the same response.
Tara, I want to rub my fingers through your hair.